Sarah Palin fans(?) yell at her bus

Oh dear, this did not go well. Just look at these furious wingnuts—who evidently did not get their Going Rogues signed after waiting in line for hours like hobos at a soup kitchen—screaming obscenities like "sign our book!" at Sarah Palin's tour bus. What monsters! What if Trig heard them?

And this (please, God) ends Sarah Palin week in America.

BREAKING: Levi Johnston working alongside—and pleasuring—homosexuals!

This week, Levi Johnston expressed his indignation over accusations by former Republican vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin (the grandmother of his child with daughter Bristol Palin) that he was an "aspiring porn [star]." Johnston told E! Online's Marc Malkin, "I don't want that image. I don't want to get into porn."

However, Unzipped has uncovered a startling fact: By posing nude in Playgirl magazine Johnston has, indeed, becoming intimately involved with the porn industry. And even more shocking was the revelation that he was recruited into a site that caters to homosexuals and also employs gay XXX film stars.

Read our in-depth investigation with photographic evidence after the jump.

Andrew Sullivan goes dark

Yesterday, Andrew Sullivan busted out back to back to back to back to back Sarah Palin posts (twenty eight, to be exact!), and now, for "only the second time," he has "gone silent" and not posted anything all day long.

I'll give you one second to guess why...(Hint: It has to do with Trig!)

Andrew Sullivan's Palinpalooza

Sarah Palin may be crazy, but what do you make of someone who has, at last count, written TWENTY EIGHT Sarah Palin blog posts in the past 24 hours?

Sarah Palin laments Levi Johnston's foray into "porn"

Here it is, the Oprah and the Sarah Palin thing, from this afternoon. This clip suits our purposes because it has to do with Levi, but you can watch the other enlightening segments here. For example, Sarah Palin quit her job so she could write Facebook notes about "death panels" and lose elections for wingnuts in upstate New York. But that is not what this is about! This is about Levi, his porn gig, his baby, and "Hollywood Ricky." Watch it.

Never-before-heard Sarah Palin speeches (for reals!), as presented by Michael Musto

Unbelievable. From The Advocate:

Village Voice columnist Michael Musto's appeared on MSNBC’s Countdown in drag on Wednesday to deliver the speeches former Republican vice-presidential nominee Sarah Palin prepared for election night last year but never got the opportunity to deliver.

According to the new book Sarah from Alaska: The Sudden Rise and Brutal Education of a New Conservative Superstar by Scott Conroy and Shushannah Walshe, the speeches were readied for Palin on election night, tailored to the two possible outcomes, but her running mate, John McCain, balked at the possibility.

MSNBC host Lawrence O’Donnell, who subbed for Keith Olbermann on Wednesday, introduced Musto’s performance as “never-before-seen footage of the former vice-presidential candidate going rogue and delivering the speech the McCain campaign did not want you to see.”

In the speeches, Palin apparently planned to present her husband Todd to the nation as “the first dude.”

Michael Musto's new book, Fork on the Left, Knife in the Back is available for pre-order now.

Happy Election Day!

While the majority of us won't be voting in the handful of state and local elections being held today across the country, you might be interested to know that one of your favorite characters from last year's national election is back on the campaign trail, sort of. Just click play—if you dare—on the You Tube thing above and pretend that it is 2008 all over again while listening to this familiar voice doing some sexy robocalls to help Virginia's Republican gubernatorial nominee. Then, thank God (or whomever) that this is all the influence and power this person has left, having been asked to make cold calls to landlines, in Virginia.

Sarah Palin called Trig "retarded"

If you believe Levi Johnston, Sarah Palin referred to her baby as a retard on multiple occasions. This is funny when one considers that Sarah Palin is an actual retard and her baby just has Down syndrome.

Also, Levi told CBS this morning that Sarah was a terrible mother, and that he has even more information on the unemployed lady that could "really hurt her." I really want to believe Levi Johnston, but I'll need to see him fully naked on the Playgirl website first. Yes, I'll trust anyone who shows me his penis.

Watch the video after the jump.

If Andrew Sullivan gets to question Trig Palin's maternity, people get to call him a crazy fag

I've hinted before at how Andrew Sullivan is obsessed with Sarah Palin's birth canal and what may or may not have come out of it, and a few days ago he was at it again with a post questioning the former governor and her womb. In reference to whether or not Sarah is Trig's mom, Andrew wrote, "I have no idea." Well, University of Wisconsin law professor and blogger Ann Althouse saw this and decided to throw some red meat to her stable of right wing readers by linking to Andrew's prodding of Palin's pussy, and the Althouse wingnuts, naturally, tore him a new one...

Sorry you guys, there will be no "Christian version" of Sarah Palin's Going Rogue

Sorry to deliver such bad news to all of you Unzipped readers who are Christians, but there's not going to be a special version of Sarah Palin's memoir for you. The rumors swirling among Evangelicals (they love to gossip) that there would be a separate edition of Going Rogue with bonus material on faith are simply not true.

News reports that Sarah Palin is planning a separate Christian version of her forthcoming memoir, Going Rogue, are false, according to her publisher, Harper Collins. The reports were so widely circulated that they appear to have caused confusion at Zondervan, a Christian publisher owned by Harper Collins, where the director of publicity said yesterday that a special Christian edition of the book had been planned but was scrapped because of the expedited timetable for the book's release.

Politico has reported on the possibility of "a slight addition on faith for the Zondervan edition," and bloggers have speculated on what information a separate Christian edition would include. Instead, Zondervan will copublish the same version of Palin's memoir and distribute it to Christian booksellers.

Well, shit. I'm still trying to wrap my brain around the idea of an English version of Sarah Palin's memoir.