Whoa, what do we have here? There have been rumors about the Pumpkins frontman, Billy Corgan, being bi, but now we may have proof!
Late one night over the weekend, we received a comment on a post about our very own Freshman of the Year finalist Marcus Mojo. It read: "I wanna have sex with u." The commenter was so serious about getting his point across, he left the same comment twice, and both entries were signed "Billy." His signature included a link to the verified and official Twitter page of none other than Billy Corgan!
They make a stunning couple, don't you think?
Now, we're aware that anyone could have typed in Billy's Twitter link to accompany their comment, but it's kind of an obscure celebrity to impersonate, right? And besides, whenever someone says something on the Internet, it's usually true!
So, we congratulate Billy on having such good taste, and we'd like to extend a personal invitation to him right here, right now, to please let us know if he'd like us to contact Marcus to see if he is interested. Anything we can do to help facilitate a potential love connection would be our pleasure. Hey, maybe Billy and Marcus could do a scene for NextDoorBuddies.com!
UPDATE: Celebrities have taken over our comments sections, and everyone is inspired by Billy's lust for Marcus! Unfortunately, all of the comments are coming from the same IP address in Virginia, so either there's a celeb gang bang going on in one house, or a lone individual is having a little fun. He/she/they are also pretending to be us, which is flattering. Either way, we're gonna let it ride and wait to see what comments come in next. Have fun!
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Oh my god, I want to fuck whomever wrote this story, but only if they are male
Posted by: Ashton Kutcher | June 30, 2009 at 07:16 PM
Ashton? YOU'RE GAY?! Thank God, now we can do it
Posted by: Jimmy Fallon | June 30, 2009 at 07:16 PM
I know I'm kind of obscure, but I want some cock too
Posted by: Edward Droste | June 30, 2009 at 07:17 PM
I'm dead, and not an A-lister by any means, but I lust for men. All that stuff I said on the Colbert Report last night about being good in bed -- that only applied to dudes.
Posted by: Jeff Goldblum | June 30, 2009 at 07:19 PM
This will come as no surprise to anyone, but I want in on this.
Posted by: Norm Coleman | June 30, 2009 at 07:21 PM
I'm the less famous guy from Smashing Pumpkins, and let's be clear about one thing: I'm gay-curious as well!
Posted by: James Iha | June 30, 2009 at 07:23 PM
This is unbelievable! Some of you are so obscure, it *has* to be true! Though I know Ashton is straight, that one must have been a troll :( :(
Posted by: editor of Unzipped.net | June 30, 2009 at 07:25 PM
I'm...actually straight.
Posted by: assistant editor of Unzipped.net | June 30, 2009 at 07:31 PM
WHAT?! If that's true, then why don't you have a conscience about telling lies with big headlines? I mean, I'm gay and oppressed, so everything I do is justified -- but YOU... for shame!!!
Posted by: editor of Unzipped.net | June 30, 2009 at 07:35 PM
Boss, this is just a gossip site, chill. "It's the Internet", so we can both do whatever we want! Uhm, except having sex with each other.
Posted by: assistant editor of Unzipped.net | June 30, 2009 at 07:36 PM
We can discuss this later after I finish writing my big JEFF GOLDBLUM WAS GAY piece.
Posted by: editor of Unzipped.net | June 30, 2009 at 07:39 PM
Don't listen to this obvious troll -- I truly am gay.
Billy
Posted by: Billy | June 30, 2009 at 07:50 PM
SEE!!! THERE'S THE PROOF THIS IS ALL REAL! Lick shit, trolls!
Posted by: editor of Unzipped.net | June 30, 2009 at 07:50 PM
Jeff Goldblum piece is "in the can", so to speak. Impacting your asses tomorrow!
Posted by: editor of Unzipped.net | June 30, 2009 at 07:54 PM
Don't listen to this obvious troll -- I truly am gay.
Billy
Posted by: Billy | June 30, 2009 at 07:54 PM
TWICE!!!!!!!!
Posted by: editor of Unzipped.net | June 30, 2009 at 07:56 PM
Those are some wicked posts
Posted by: Donald | June 30, 2009 at 11:40 PM