Colby Keller: "Will fuck for food"

 
Photos: Colby Keller

What's with the porn industry these days? First Diesel Washington retires because he can't find work. Then the supercalifragilistic-hot David Chase is virtually overlooked by the studios—including the one where he got his start, Randy Blue. Are we the only ones wondering why the hell these guys can't get hired?

Now we hear that another Randy Blue boy, the criminally underused Colby Keller, is having such a hard time finding work that he's considering doing bareback porn. Say it ain't so! Colby himself had this to say to us via e-mail:

I'm defaulting on my student loans. All of my fans must have lost their jobs!! What do you think of bb porn? I guess that's where I'm supposed to wind up next right? Maybe the site Jake Cruise runs? Or maybe I could start a security camera based, BB homeless ex-gay porn star website. I wouldn't have sex, just scrounge around for raw food in dumpsters. What do you think? I could charge a quarter for the bus or maybe a cold one?

Awww. Has it really come to this? I mean, has anyone seen this guy? Colby Keller is one of the all-time hottest nerdy-looking types you'll ever find, and with his facial hair grown in and his body pumped up from hard work at the gym, he's looking better than ever. His scene with Arpad Miklos in the just-out Mustang flick XXX (from directing duo Steve Cruz and Leif Gobo) is, frankly, one of the hottest things we've seen in months. There's no mistaking the chemistry they have together—or the talent Colby has for making sex look so good that you almost feel like you're the one fucking him.

We've long admired Keller's work. From his work in Joe Gage's Alabama Takedown to his scene in Lifeguard: The Men of Deep Water Beach (another Gage flick from Titan), Colby has displayed something too often lacking in other porn stars: a sense of realness. Colby has relatability. Well, OK, and he has a big dick. But we'd like him even if he had an average one. Really.

So consider this our personal plea to all the studios who don't see what we see when it comes to guys like Colby Keller. Please, give these men a job before they resort to giving hand jobs in alleyways for the rest of your french fries or something.

Take a look at our exclusive gallery of Colby's "bum pics" after the jump, then see what he's got to offer to porn on Below the Belt.

Well, it's obvious he's still in good enough shape to shoot movies. And it's good to know they have up-to-date equipment on skid row these days.

You know, this reminds me. There's this one bum who's always asking for change down on Hollywood Boulevard, and he's really kind of hot in a scruffy, unbathed, homeless sort of way. Sometimes I've thought about blindfolding him and taking him to my place and letting him take a shower and giving him some food if he'd have sex with me, then blindfolding him and driving him back to the Boulevard and giving him $20, but then I thought that might be a little skanky of me. Wait, what am I talking about? I work in porn.

You know it's hard times when a porn star can't afford to go to the tanning salon. I mean, really, this kid needs some help!

Yeah, baby, flex those guns and look menacing for the camera. That'll get you work. After all, everyone knows there's nothing hotter than an angry fuck.

At first glance, it looks like he's trying to pose like the statue of David, but then we remembered: When begging for food, it's always best to look down as if you're ashamed.

Awww, Colby, chin up. You still have a big dick. See it on Below the Belt.

Comments

[RJ]

Keller has a great bod, for sure. But maybe he should go get a non-industry job, eh? Works for us regular folks.

[Adam]

Jesus that's depressing. I've been a fan of his since his Sean Cody days. Hopefully he'll find some more work soon.

[Colby Keller]

Thanks RJ, but I already have three non-industry jobs, and I'm still just barely making rent! We are living through another Great Depression you know. . . it isn't exactly easy, particularly when you're over-educated and shy as all fuck like me. :-(

[Joel]

Come live with me. I got a spare room, just help out around the house and with some of the bills.
And I'm only in my 30's

[RJ]

Thanks for the response, CK. I'm glad to know you're not putting all your eggs in the porn basket. I hope things work out for you soon. FWIW, I hope you don't go the bareback route--no matter what they say, it seems far too dangerous.

[Halnova]

CK....Say no to BB. DUMB.STUPID.DANGEROUS.

[toddo]

colby, please don't do anything rash! If you have a website or something, ask your fans to contribute what they wish (for favors to be collected later?). You've got to have some following by now. I remember you from before the titan films (on sean cody?) even though the titan with you and your prospective father in law was hot as fuck....best of luck man

[Robert]

It is really a shame. Colby, you're such a hot guy. Have ever considered to register at Xtube (or some similar site) and offer to do personalized clips (in exchange for some nice contribution)? However I don't know if and how much you'd have to pay upfront for such a web service and how commercially successful these ventures are in the first place.

[Jett Blakk]

I've wanted to use Colby in a movie for a long time, but never knew how to contact him. Colby, email me at jett@jettblakk.com.

JBK

[Jim]

Colby - I'd love to help you out but I'm out of work myself...if you're ever in Chicago I'll take you out for lunch or something though...