BREAKING: Mason Wyler returns to his blog!

HOORAY! He's baaaaaack!

After almost a month off, Mason Wyler has returned to his blog and, as you might expect, he has a load of "desperate, slutty stories to tell" (his words, not mine). The post is full of all the Wyler charm you've come to jerk off and/or throw up in your mouth to. For starters, he reveals how he handles drunk guys who offer to fuck him in bars (hint: he fucks them), and then he goes on to give us a detailed list of who he fucked and who he tried to fuck while he was gone.

This blog post, which is about someone else's blog post, is entirely too long already, so let's get to it and look at Mason Wyler's "Fucket List" from his monthlong odyssey of whoring it up, after the jump!

First, he sets the scene (hilariously) at the GayVNs:

It was basically a weekend-long industry event centered around gay porn catered to the sluts who make it and the perverts who buy and sell it. Each event was so overcrowded with porn models and wanna-be porn models that there wasn't any room left for the "fat bastards" who would otherwise be there, butting in on conversations that don't involve them. I met many people, made a few friends, attempted to have sex with all of them, and failed miserably.

Well, he didn't try to have sex with me. Then again, I don't know. Maybe the handshake he gave me was Mason's own traditional signal for "fuck me right now" and I just didn't catch on. Oh well, next time!

Here's Mason's list of people he met and either failed to fuck or actually fucked. If you're on it...uh, congratulations?

-Shane Frost. Result: Failed to fuck. He's hot, but two bottoms do not make a top—good thing you passed, Shane.

-Jay & Paul from TheSword.com. Result: Failed to fuck. Hey, can't blame him for this attempt.

-Diesel Washington. Result: Failed to fuck. Don't let it get to you, Mason. He might've just been too stoned.

-Scott Boardman from Cocktails With The Stars. Result: Failed to fuck. Again, can't blame him for this one either. Maybe aim lower?

All right, I'm bored.

This list goes on (and on, and on) -- including Dallas Reeves, more bloggers, Aaron King (who he actually did fuck), and the Westin Hotel bellhops -- and you can read all about it in greater detail on Mason's blog.

P.S. This is the best line of the whole thing: "...style is as important in my life as my look." That quote just made me love you a little bit more, Mason. XOXO.